Today we bring you words from the heart, in the spirit of self-love. Read on for our thoughts on self-care during divorce.


neil-foresterNEIL FORESTER

My clients often remark that not knowing what the future holds for their post-divorce life is one of the most stressful parts of the process. I say fight that stress by learning everything you can during the process. Make sure you grasp the financial implications and parenting decisions being made. Ask loads of questions and stay focused on your long-term goals. The more you know, the more comfortable you’ll be moving forward. When fear starts to win, tell yourself “I have everything I need.” Repeat. Because it’s true — you may not have everything you want right now; but if you take pause, you probably do have everything you need.


Keeley L. Nickelson, Family Law AttorneyKEELEY NICKELSON

“I know you cost $XXX an hour, but I just need to tell you this one story.”

“I didn’t get to see my therapist this month, so I’m feeling very frazzled.”

A lot of clients assume that we can help them with the emotional aspects of a divorce, but for the most part, that’s not the type of counsel we are qualified to give. If you find yourself in an emotional rut, talk to someone who is licensed to give that type of advice. And please don’t be offended when we suggest therapy as a form of self-care. Your bank account will thank you.


MICHELLE STOWELLmichelle-stowell

When going through the divorce process, it’s very easy to get overwhelmed with everyday life. But you still have to go to work, take care of the kids, pay bills, and generally keep up with a daily routine. Clients I find who successfully navigate divorce are the ones who stay vigilant with healthy eating, stress-relieving exercise, and maintaining friendships. They also stay focused on finding the balance between moving on and giving themselves time to heal.


matthew-purcellMATT PURCELL

Divorce is stressful enough without making one of your primary activities thinking about your divorce. I usually recommend that clients find something, anything, that they enjoy doing — that isn’t self-destructive — and carve out time to do more of it.

Tennis. Golf. Writing. Drawing. Whatever. These types of creative or physical outlets can be tremendous stress-relievers.

It’s okay to balance a healthy distraction with making meaningful headway on your divorce journey.



Beyond my law practice, I relish the practice of yoga. These are much-needed resting periods for my mind and body during typical weeks of harried pace between courtrooms and consultations. I encourage my clients to find their own mindful moments while navigating the divorce process. You cannot make decisions in your own – or your family’s – best interests if you don’t make it a priority to find me-time on occasion. And… the occasional glass of wine helps in the self-love department.


ABOUT THE FIRM: FORESTER PURCELL STOWELL PC is a Northern California law firm focused exclusively on specialized counsel for complex divorce and family law issues. Its shareholders are Certified Family Law Specialists, recognized by the State Bar of California’s Board of Legal Specialization. The firm regularly represents business owners, professionals, and other high net worth individuals (or their spouses) in divorce, custody disputes, premarital agreements, and related actions. Attorneys can be reached at or 916 293 4000. This information is general in nature and should not be construed as legal advice.
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